Writing along with...
Writing prompts and reflections with Victoria Bennett
‘Every memoir should brim over with the physical experiences that once streamed in — the smell of garlicky gumbo, your hand in an animal’s fur, the ocean’s phosphor lighting up bodies underwater all acid green. Of all memoir’s five elements, carnality is the most primary and necessary’ (Mary Kerr, The Art of Memoir)
NOTE: The writing exercise is available in the text below, or you can click and listen to the audio at the top of this post.
A memoir is, by nature, a story drawn from the past - but to write a memoir well, we must be present within it. This means being present in the moment, the memory, and the page.
Being present on the page is the simplest on the surface but possibly the most challenging of writing practice. When we turn up to the page, we need to honour it. We need to give it our attention — whether that is for three minutes or three hours. For that time, we are in a relationship only with that space. We don’t turn up with a part of us still attached to the outside world - through our phones, emails, and distractions. We don’t turn up to it already set on avoiding its attention. We turn up, and we are present.
When writing my own memoir, I was a full-time carer and mother to a young child. Often, the time I could give to that relationship with the page was limited to minutes. My simple practice was to light a candle and write for as long as possible before I was needed again. When I had to leave the space, I blew the candle out, but for as long as I was there and the candle was burning, the whole world was in that space between me and the page. So that is what I am inviting you to do now.
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Tune into the moment - writing exercise
In the following exercise, although I may reference writing, I invite you to use whatever form of note-taking is most accessible - you might want to write long-hand into a notebook, directly onto your screen, or make an audio note.
There are 3 prompts in total, with 5 minutes of writing time for each one. Set a timer for 5 minutes (I use an egg timer - which is entirely the fault of Cathy Rentzenbrink!)
When the sand has gone through the timer, begin the next prompt.
Close your eyes for a moment. Take a few breaths. Feel your breath in your body. Feel the air on your skin. Slow the moment down. We are about to dive into memory. Count back slowly - 3, 2, 1.
Prompt 1
When you are ready, quickly note some significant places from your life. These can be places now or from your past. They might be specific geographical places or interior or exterior locations such as a specific cafe or place in nature. Note down as many as you can without trying to control which you choose.
Prompt 2
Pick ONE - again, don’t think too hard. Note down as much external physical detail as you can about that place - remember to dig into sensory details, too.
Prompt 3
Now - we will dig a bit deeper into the moment.
What time of day is it? What is the weather? Are you hot or cold, dry or damp? Is this place familiar to you, or is this the first time you have been here? Are you there on your own or with someone else? If you are there with someone, what are they doing? What is being said? What are you wearing? Can you taste anything? Smell anything? See or hear anything? Is there music playing? What age are you? What are you feeling in your body? Where are you feeling it? What are you thinking right now? Does anyone else know you are thinking this? What do you notice now that you didn’t notice before?
Before you leave this memory, enter this moment as you are now, and thank yourself for this memory - if you want to, hug yourself. Let yourself know that this memory is safe with you.
Take a few breaths. Notice where you are right now. As you breathe, notice where the air meets your skin. Feel yourself back in your body. Breathe, and count back - 3 -2 - 1 - and return to the room.
Remember, it’s really important to practice self-care when writing memoir, so do make sure to ground yourself in something comforting right now - whether that is a walk, a cup of tea, or just a stretch or wiggle in the space you are in right now.
Thanks for joining me!
Wild wishes,
Victoria x